Your Habits Aren’t Fragile. You’re Just Human.
A Thanksgiving Reset 🦃
If your habits only work when everything is controlled, they aren’t habits. They’re role-playing.
I get reminded of this every Thanksgiving.
The kitchen gets loud.
The house fills up.
My routines drift.
I eat things I don’t usually eat.
I stay up later than I planned.
Nothing about the week looks like my “normal.”
And still… nothing actually falls apart.
For years, I didn’t trust that.
I used to treat Thanksgiving like a hazard to overcome.
The food.
The travel.
The break in structure.
I’d feel myself grasping, trying to protect whatever progress I thought I might lose.
And honestly, I wasted so much time in those years trying to optimize my time.
I’d sit at the table half-present, scrolling for Black Friday deals I didn’t need.
Searching for the “ideal purchase” like it could fix some part of me.
Refreshing tabs.
Comparing.
Overthinking.
Convincing myself it was thoughtful planning, when really I was avoiding being still.
None of it made life better.
It just made the holiday feel shorter.
In recent years, I’ve been trying to handle it differently.
The Science Behind “Mostly Consistent”
Habit researchers Angela Duckworth and Brian Galla found something important:
People who stay mostly consistent over time do better than people who try to stay perfect.
Perfect streaks collapse.
"Pretty often” holds.
That’s the part I didn’t understand when I was younger and stuck in optimization mode.
Two or three days of softer structure isn’t a setback.
It’s precisely what a human experience includes.
The Real Habit Test
Thanksgiving pressure-tests your habits more honestly than any typical week.
It asks:
Can you bend?
Can you release perfection without losing direction?
Can you return gently instead of punishing yourself?
If a holiday knocks you off completely, the problem isn’t the holiday.
It’s the rigidity.
Being Here Matters More Than Being Perfect
This year, I’m doing it this way:
I’ll eat with my blended family.
I’ll put my phone away and engage.
I’ll stop chasing the dopamine hit of a “limited-time deal.”
I’ll take a walk after dinner.
I’ll let myself be a person for a minute.
And when the week is over, I’ll step back into my routines.
Not because I have to.
Because I get to.
Momentum isn’t built on purity.
It’s built on “most days.”
And Since It’s Thanksgiving…
I hope you get a plate you love, a moment that slows you down, and at least one laugh you didn’t expect.
Happy Thanksgiving.
