Here and There
28 Days of Asking: Day 18
Today was Lauren’s birthday. The actual day.
We stayed in bed late. Breakfast came to us. No alarms. No agenda. Just coffee and covers and the slow unfolding of a morning with nowhere to be.
Eventually we made our way out. A trail up to the Sonoma Valley Overlook. Beautiful weather. The kind of hike where you stop talking for a while and just walk. The valley stretched out below us, vineyards stitched into the hills, the sky finally clear after days of gray.
We came back into town for lunch. Then back to the hotel so Lauren could have a massage. I used the time to catch up on emails; batch handling the things that had been piling up. A nice window to clear the deck.
Afterwards we slipped into the hot tub together. Steam rising. The day stretched with ease.
Now we’re back in the room. Getting ready slowly. The highlight dinner still ahead.
Day 18: What’s the difference between being there and being present?
I’d love to tell you I was fully present every moment today. That my mind never wandered. That I didn’t check my phone or drift into a thought about work or home.
But I’m human. I still get distracted. I still catch myself somewhere else even when I want to be here.
The difference isn’t perfection. It’s noticing. It’s coming back.
Being there is showing up. Being present is returning (again and again) when your attention slips.
Today I did both. Showed up. Drifted. Came back. Stayed longer than I left.
So I’m asking: What’s the difference between being there and being present?
It’s not about never getting distracted. It’s about what you do when you notice you’re gone.
When was the last time you caught yourself drifting and actually came back? Not perfectly. Just honestly.
Heading out to enjoy dinner now.
