Good Enough
28 Days of Asking: Day 16
The gap between how I wanted to feel and how I actually feel has been following me around all weekend.
I had a picture of this trip. Fully recovered. Full appetite. Full energy. Ready to eat my way through wine country, be present for every tasting, and show up as the best version of myself for Lauren’s 40th.
I do this a lot. Build an ideal state in my head before I arrive anywhere. The perfect workout. The perfect meal. The perfect way to show up for the people I love. And when reality doesn’t match the picture, there’s a voice that whispers: you’re falling short.
It’s exhausting, if I’m honest. Measuring the distance between what is and what I thought should be.
Sunday. The drive out of San Francisco took about an hour. Easy. Quiet. Light rain on the windshield the whole way.
We stopped once for the vista lookout on the north side of the Golden Gate. Damp and cool, the bridge disappearing into fog behind us, wine country waiting ahead. It felt like a threshold.
I was relieved to leave. Not because San Francisco wasn’t good, it was. But my body has been fighting me for days, and I was anxious to feel better for this part of the trip. The part I’d been looking forward to most.
We came straight to the hotel, then killed time with lunch and a wander around Sonoma Square. Warm and charming with a little touristy splash. Historic buildings. Small shops. The kind of place that doesn’t ask much of you.
And now, we’re back at the hotel, slipping into the hot tub before dinner. Rain still falling lightly outside. Steam rising off the water. Lauren next to me. Her 40th birthday weekend is unfolding exactly as it should, even if I’m only at 70 percent.
Day 16: What if good enough is actually good enough?
What if I don’t need to reach the ideal state to be present? To enjoy? To show up?
What if this version: tired, tender, still recovering, is enough?
Where are you holding out for the ideal? What would shift if you let go of the picture and showed up with what you actually have?
I’m in the hot tub, holding steady with less than a full tank. And that's enough for today.
